Smoked Salmon Pinwheels & the Art of Easy Entertaining

Salmon Pinwheels
Smoked Salmon Pinwheels, easy to make but look impressive.

Welcome back differential readers to another info-taining post of the Pot and Pan Handler’s misunderstood food & travel blog. Shout out to that dude named Spam who is an avid poster; we have an overstuffed folder devoted to that guy! Thanks for all the interest Spam! Today we’re talking about smoked salmon pinwheels, easy to make and perfectly acceptable to make a day or two in advance but they’ll still taste divine, we promise.

A word or two on salmon

Did you believe me that this was only going to be a word or two? There’s clearly a paragraph here, you’re a little bit gullible, but I still like you. As I used to work in BBQ restaurant, I’ve smoked more salmon than I care to remember and one thing about smoked salmon I learned was wild caught salmon works better for smoking than farmed. Why, you ask: animal Cruelty, pollution, harm to our fragile ecosystem or possibly un-hugged trees? Naw, basically wild caught just tastes better.

Okay, you’re right, taste is subjective, but here’s scientific reasoning… fat. Wild salmon spend their lives swimming until a homing beacon goes off in their head prompting them to swim UP river to mate. Farmed salmon sit there like parent’s night at the retirement home, all day, every day. Fat lends itself very well to taking on the flavor of smoke and in the case of farmed salmon it’s too much, overbearing. Wild salmon on the other hand with less fat the delicate salmon and smoky undertones achieve a flavor balance unachievable with farmed salmon. So when you’re talking smoked salmon It’s worth a few extra $$ for the wild stuff. If you are absolutely set on farmed salmon, I’d recommend Hofseth, the Norwegian art of taste bitches!

Salmon Pinwheels a caterer’s friend

Salmon Pinwheels are just that, a caterer’s friend and as such they are your friend as well. Why? They can be prepared ahead of time. Come serving time they just need to be fussily plated on greens or block salt or however they are being presented. This year when I needed some for Super Bowl Sunday, I made them on Friday. Meanwhile they sat in the fridge waiting, for me, not the other way around. Money.

Salmon Pinwheels

You will need:

4 ounces COLD smoked wild salmon

1/3 cup room temperature cream cheese

1 Tblspn dill weed (dill pairs with salmon like peanut butter pairs with jelly)

1 Tblspn parsley

1 Tblspn chive

A pinch of cayenne

A squeeze of ½ a lemon (or lime)

Salt and pepper to taste (remember smoked salmon is already a bit salty)

Some extra chives for a garnish

Salmon Pinwheels

You will do:

Combine all ingredients except salmon.

Herbed cream cheese
Cream cheese mixture @ room temp.

Place and spread enough of the mixture 1-2 Tblspns (depending on size of salmon slice) of mixture on sliced smoked salmon. Like rolling a burrito, you want it to be full, but not so full ingredients are falling out the end. Then roll that mother fucker up, don’t even bother tasting it yet because that shit needs to be cold to taste good. Let it chill for an hour or two before tasting.

Cream cheese in Smoked salmon
Roll smoked salmon into logs and make like Ben Carson, chill.

When it comes time to tasting, cut the salmon into pinwheels (about ½ inch) and taste. Does it taste good? You bet your ass it tastes good. Finish cutting salmon into pinwheels and garnish pinwheels with some chive and a pinch of sea salt if necessary.

Smoked Salmon Pinwheels
Slice with a warm knife. Eat & repeat.

Hope you find these cheap and easy catering eats as tasty as we do. Coming soon: we swim a sea of fake breasts to get to Daniel Boulod’s Bistro Moderne in Downtown Miami. We hope to see you there. -Pot and Pan Handler

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